Who’s the star? Who’s the fucking Rockstar in this crappy little world? I can’t hear you!!
Thoughts like that didn’t usually pop into my head when I was off the clock, but you had to say this kind of stuff out loud in the public sphere- it was part of what kept the show popular, and our crew relevant. Well… my show. Okay - okay, our show.
Sensational Seekers, aka Hook on the Spook, had left cozy old Malm? far behind and rolled up to one of Sweden’s most mysterious spots.
As the founder of the team, I stayed sharp as ever- grinning with trademark irony at the wooden gazebo near the mayor’s cottage, where the man himself had just sat down like it was his royal throne.
Beside me, Ada straightened her back and switched into full memory - recording mode, preparing to absorb every crumb of detail from the interviewee. From behind me, Odile was already rubbing his shoulder against mine while firing up his camera rig. The soft case for the gear rested neatly at his feet.
Usually, Ada and Odile rotated between episodes, subbing in for each other when needed. The one face that stayed constantly under the spotlight- always the brand’s beating heart- was me. Me and only me. That’s how the audience wanted it, and you gotta give the people what they want.
Not that I loved playing the part of the arrogant douchebag who spits edgy lines for views… but the alternative was slapping on a tie and selling my soul to some office gig. So yeah, if staying free meant leaning into the rebel persona, I’d lean all the way in.
Anyway, I’m rambling. The mayor was already sipping from his jumbo coffee mug. Time to begin his verbal execution.
- Folks, here we are on this late and chilly evening, deep in the ass - end of nowhere, getting ready to chat with the mayor of a humble village near the mysterious lake ?vrekj?la. The man has generously agreed to warn us about the dangers that supposedly lurk around that body of water.
Our audience loves a good buildup- like in a proper horror movie- so we don’t startle them right out of the gate. First, you collect the folklore, chat with some locals, and ease them into the eerie new reality of impending fear.
Though, let’s be real- no horrors have come our way just yet. Monsters and ghouls seem pretty reluctant to leap out from the bushes and devour us on camera. Maybe because they don’t exist? Just saying. Anyway. Gotta keep the monologue going. The viewer’s love this shit.
Didn’t even get to finish the sentence. The mayor- this dried - up, sickly - looking old guy- suddenly blinked to life. He sneezed like a cannon and hissed at me:
- What the hell did you just say, boy?! What did you call our village? Say that again!
Adelgunda aka Ada jumped in first, like the seasoned crisis manager she was, rushing to calm down the fuming old man, offended over god knows what. She explained that we weren’t trying to mock him or his town- we just wanted to learn more about the lake, the lore, y’know?
Odile nearly fell over laughing, ducking behind his camera:
- Honestly, people are wild. You can offend someone just by being slightly spicier than a conversation about That’s all it takes to make humans bristle. I swear by my Great Hamster Benny.
That’s why Odile was irreplaceable in our little trio. His calm, wise takes always hit home with the regular folks. Adelgunda led by being the voice of reason. And me? I brought the chaos. The drama. The show, baby! And it’s time to keep it rolling.
Stolen novel; please report.
Meanwhile, after Ada’s gentle persuasion, the mayor simmered down again- back to being dull ashes instead of flaring fire. Too bad. It’s so much easier to make viral content when people are yelling. Looks like it’s up to me. As always.
- As you can see, - I said cheerfully, - Sverr here- the mayor- is deeply devoted to his So let’s switch gears and talk about the place you and I, dear viewers, actually care about. -
- Mayor, what can you tells us about ?vrekj?la? Any legends or creepy rumors? Let’s start with a classic: maybe there was a battle way back when- Teutonic knights, crusaders, Templars, or just a bunch of armored dudes- and now the lake floor is littered with their bones, while their restless souls still wander around, itching for revenge. -
- Or hey, let’s really go full cliché: some girl or guy had their heart broken and hurled themselves into the lake, cursing the waters forever. -
- But the best, - I grinned, - would be if you stood up right now with a haunted look on your face and growled in a spooky voice: -
‘Something Evil lives there… real evil, not the kind we imagine! Its presence strikes without warning, and the claw of Death spares no one. Beware the blood - eyed hound of Darkness!’ -
Our cameraman was barely holding it together, snorting with laughter while somehow keeping the frame steady thanks to sheer muscle memory. Adelgunda sighed softly, already prepping her next round of mayor - soothing while composing the right script on the fly.
And I? I was in my element. The viewer’s love when I go all - in like this. And tonight, I was on fire.
I kept my triumphant gaze locked on the mayor, ready for a fresh round of drama, but he didn’t bite. Nope. Just like in a horror movie- or like he was following my damn script- he stood up. Not to argue. Not to warn us. He just said, dry as dust:
- Go check it out yourselves. You’ll have a great time, I’m - Then he walked off to his house and shut the door tight behind him. Only Odile had something to say:
- He’s got a Interview didn’t work out, but he’s right. We do need to see it for ourselves. I swear on my- -
My friend and co - host was cut off in the most unexpected way. By someone no one expected. Ada pointed her chin toward something that had caught her attention and said:
- Look! Over
A completely disheveled and visibly agitated woman in a police uniform came sprinting toward the mayor’s house. Her cop jacket was half unzipped despite the freezing day, and she plowed through the snow with a sprinter’s determination. Her long hair, braided into two heavy plaits, whipped against her shoulders, and her mouth was twisted by heavy breathing.
– Friends, looks like we’ve got another chance to talk to a representative of law enforcement, – Ada began hopefully and tried to catch the cop’s attention, but the woman didn’t even glance in our direction. She ran straight to the mayor’s door and started pounding on it with her fist. In her frenzy, she apparently forgot doorbells were a thing.
What’s wild is that the door opened instantly.
The mayor must’ve been waiting for her, because he let her in right away and slammed the door behind her, cutting us off from whatever was about to go down inside.
We always shot in a non - stop format, barely cutting anything in post, so everything that just happened was right there for the viewers to see. And yeah yeah, I know I’m overusing that line about how much the audience loves us, but seriously, what can I say? We’re their freaking IDOLS!
- Did you see that? – Adelgunda turned to me, – she was holding some kind of scroll, and inside was this object… about the size of a hand. Whatever, never mind.
She turned to the camera, now locked on her, and addressed the viewers:
- As you can see, folks, local authorities aren’t exactly available for interviews right now. But no worries, because we’re just a short drive away from the infamous ?vrekj?la Lake, which hasn’t seen a single tourist or local in years thanks to a whole stack of weird incidents.
If the Dyatlov Pass tragedy was a one - time thing, well, this place has a body count stretching across years – hell, even eras. We’ll tell you more on the way there, because tomorrow morning we’re heading to the lake, fully loaded with all the gear we need to run a proper investigation. But for now – how about we all chill a bit, yeah?
We stood in front of the camera for a little posing – my co - host smiled sweetly, while I gave the lens a toothy grin and a wink. Our performance wrapped up with an overly tense comment from Odile, who honestly kinda brought me down this time:
- Ancient Evil might not be such a myth after all, with everyone around here acting so damn suspicious. And that’s seriously weird. I swear on my Beloved Hamster Benny!