Have you ever been excited about a new job, then suddenly blink and ten years pass you by just like that? You can’t eat junk food like you used to, have fat in places you didn’t think were possible, and worst of all, everyone around you considers you “middle-aged.” And you think to yourself, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Well, that’s my life.
However, today was different from any other day. I woke up to a wonderful note from my girlfriend of twelve years, telling me she was breaking up with me and took all the “important stuff” out of our apartment. If I read her note correctly, she was tired of living with someone who, in her words, “played video games all day and wasn’t interested in becoming a better person.” end quote. What the hell was that supposed to mean anyway?
I have a job.
I have an apartment.
And I own my car.
Sure, I play games when I’m not working, and I might spend the better half of the weekend playing Fortnite, but I’ve always made time for her. Why the hell should I feel the need to better myself if I already am happy with my life. Yes, I admit that the last ten years have slipped away from me, but Karren and I built a nice, comfortable, and easy life with each other. I never wanted to go to school or change my career.
Listen, it takes a patient person to work in retail for ten years. My customer service skills are A-plus. I get to talk about video games all day, and I even get games for free from time to time. If I wanted to, I could leave GameStop at any moment. But the truth was, I didn’t want to and I suppose Karren couldn’t accept that.
She was always on my ass about going back to school or changing to a career rather than a job, but working retail is a career. Perhaps instead of sadness, I felt some sense of relief. If she couldn’t accept me for who I was, then why was I fighting every day?
Did I love her, or was I just an asshole?
I didn’t want to answer that question.
“Hey man, can you help me out?” a voice projected from across the store. It was an older man with gray hair and wearing a blazer. He looked much like a wannabe college English professor.
“Yeah, how can I help you, sir?” I walked out from behind the Cashwrap and to the sales floor to meet him. I glanced at the box he was holding in his hands. He appeared to be uncertain of what he was holding. It was a game, but he didn’t look like he belonged inside a game store.
“So, my son wants to play Fortnite, but I don’t understand which one I need to buy. These games all look different and it’s rather confusing.” The professor stared at me like I was about to solve all of his problems.
“Well, sir, that’s because what you’re looking at isn’t actually Fortnite, it’s V-bucks, the in-game currency for Fortnite and downloadable content for a better in-game experience. The game is free to play.” I was ready for the next progression of this conversation with the ever-so-confused, digitally illiterate customer.
“But how does he get the game?”
“Honestly, he probably already has it and wants to con you into buying in-game content for him. He’s a punk, every kid knows how to download Fortnite.” Not my best moment, but my girlfriend just dumped me, and I still made it into work.
“What the hell did you just say? My son would never do that.”
“Yet you’re here at my store with the Transformers Downloadable Content in your hands.”
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The professor’s face became red, and he stared at me. It made me feel uncomfortable. “You’re an asshole and you’re getting a one-star review,” he yelled. The professor dropped the box art on the floor and walked out of the store.
“You’re welcome for saving you money.” I bent over to pick up the box art and placed it in its respective spot on the shelf.
“Wowzah, bad day, huh,” a voice projected from the other side of the dusty store.
“Hey, friend, I didn’t see you come in.” I walked past the end caps to see what the voice was doing.
“I’ve been here for a while.”
“I didn’t realize.” I saw a person dressed in what appeared to be some sort of space suit. It had a bright blue visor, covering their face. The suit looked like a mix between an old space suit from the 1950s and the suits from Tron, the movie. They remained kneeling and turned my way. I continued, “sorry, sir, it’s store policy that your face can’t be covered like that.”
“Oh, that’s rather alright. I’m afraid I can’t do that. The name’s Silas. I don’t mean any harm to your sweet little store. In fact, I am here to help set you on the right path.” The voice sounded like an old-timey radio show host from the 1950s. It was off-putting. They stood up and towered over me.
“Right, I’m afraid solicitors aren’t welcome here,” I said in my best customer service voice.
“Gallagher, I assure you, what I’m selling you is a better future. Do you truly want to work at GameStop forever?”
“What? How the hell do you know my name!” I questioned.
They pointed at my nametag. “Perhaps just think about it. What I am offering you is a new venture. But if you don’t want to take it, I understand you have free will.”
“Okay? Thanks, I think.” My palms were sweating. Something about their verbiage creeped me out.
“Just consider it. You have some options, all of which, offer a better path than the one you are on.” They walked over to the counter and dropped what appeared to be a colorful set of keys.
“I’m happy with my life,” I reassured Silas.
“They looked around the store. “Yes, it looks like it. If you’re curious about getting a new start, simply use one of my keys on your back door.”
“I’ll pass, but thanks for the sound advice. Will you be buying anything today, Silas?”
“Only your freedom. Have you ever felt like your choices were never your own?”
“I’m sorry, um, sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”
They slowly walked backwards. I think they were staring at me, but I couldn’t be sure. They made their way to the front door and waited for a second. “Gallagher, I really do hope you make the right decision, at least, for your own sake.” And just like that, they turned around and walked straight out that door.
I laughed off the whole thing. Certainly, it was a very dedicated cosplayer pranking me. And it worked on me for a minute. As I continued organizing my store, I glanced at the keys that Silas placed on my counter. I still hadn’t touched them, but I could have sworn that the keys were glowing. Maybe I was stressed and my eyes weren’t working correctly.
I finally worked up the courage to pick up the keys. Upon further investigation, it was three keys that rested on a rather large purple ring. Each key had words etched on it. The small letters were difficult to read. The red key had the words FUCKA on it, and in even smaller letters, I read: The Federation of Unionized Champions Kicking Ass. I had no clue what that meant, but on the other side of the key, it had a wrestling ring on it.
The Green key simply said, DCC. The words Dungeon Car Carnage. The other side of the key had what looked like a racecar. I paused, impressed with how much detail each key had etched on it. There was no chance the keys were human-made.
Finally, the last key was purple. It read, BRR. Battle Royal Rite. I had no clue what that meant either, but all of them sounded like some kind of weird game. I looked on the other side of the key, but this key had nothing on the other side. It appeared that there once was something on it, however, I couldn’t figure it out. My curiosity was piqued and I wanted to simply see if anything would happen.
I grabbed the keys and hightailed it to my back door. Obviously, the correct choice was DCC. I firmly grabbed the green key with the intention of seeing if it would fit in the lock. Just as I held the key up to the door, something stopped me from pushing it into the lock, like an invisible force of some kind. I tried the red key and then the purple key with the same result.
“What in the actual fuck is going on?” I stared at the door in the back of my GameStop store in disbelief.
[Poll initiated]
[Options are as follows]
[DCC]
[BRR]
[FUCKA]
POLL!
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