I've never been able to get used to the terrors of Chaos. I don't think I ever will be able to. I thought I could order it—that I was given this power to do good by controlling the evil—but that's not true either. The truth is that chaos cannot be mastered—it wouldn't be chaos if it were. My mission is not to stop it, but to become one with it and use it to my advantage.

  Wake up.

  A storm of blue and black butterflies flies around me. My blood leaks through the field of crimson flowers and feeds them until they ascend to the heavens. Boiling black oil burns through my veins until it consumes my body: horns grow on my head like a crown, monsters grow from the blood that falls from all-seeing eyes.

  Memories, decisions, paths, and destinies. All of them, however, fade away—directed and undone before my will.

  For I am the one who divides the heavens from the earth.

  Wake up, Sieghart.

  I open my eyes. Calm, cold water surrounds my body. I feel my arms and legs floating, but my head is resting on Morgana's lap. The fairy watches me with a worried face and inhales, her fingers running carefully through my hair.

  “It's about time.”

  I squeeze my eyes shut. My head hurts. A dream within a dream? No. I manipulated Chaos. If Morgana is on my side, then she saw everything I saw.

  “… How long did I sleep?”

  “A long time.”

  I look around. We're in the center of the clearing. Grass shines like an emerald, water blue like a sapphire, flowers as colorful as rainbows. A forest surrounds us, but its darkness doesn't invoke the evil one.

  “The Unknown…?”

  Morgana nods. “It seems you've conquered the Unknown.”

  “… No. That's just the first floor. There's much more beyond the forest.”

  “That's good enough for now, don't you think?”

  I shrug and nod. “Yes.”

  “How do you feel?”

  I frown and inhale. I remember the blood roses and the pillars of ice, the sapphire and crimson fire. I remember reaching a new level of my power, of my decision to travel through the only destination that allows me to achieve some virtue; then of being thanked with stones and curses.

  “Different.”

  “Let's go. Say what you feel.”

  “That's not a good idea.”

  “Right, you feel a lot of things. Is that why you're always so apathetic? Are you overwhelmed?”

  “I think that's one of the reasons. You must know the other.”

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  “… Yes. Some things are better left unsaid. All right, I understand. I'll rephrase the question: what do you think of all this?”

  “Hm…” I close my eyes. “I did what I had to do not to succumb. I took the step that everyone told me not to take. I admit, I'm afraid that I won't make it, that I'll fall and give in to the Lion again. I wish my departure had been different, but I have to keep going. For humanity. For me. For you, even.”

  Morgana gives a sad smile. “Cute. I'm proud.”

  I smile for a second, then my eyes widen.

  A memory rises from the depths of my mind and tears through my numbness. Something I knew had happened, but hadn't paid enough attention to. Maybe I wanted it that way. Once remembered, however, no amount of numbing or confusion could get the images out of my head.

  “I devoured him.” I nod to myself. “I devoured him.”

  Morgana inhales. “We don't need to talk about that now.”

  With the shock of surprise, acceptance falls over my gaze and I remain motionless. “You want me to answer. I'll answer.”

  “… I at least want to know about that: how do you feel?”

  My eyes wander over the Unknown, then I swallow. I try to find a reason why I devoured Aldwyn.

  I think I was manipulated by the fairy in the last few minutes, but our mana difference was too great for that. Perhaps the Lion took hold of me in a moment of weakness after my epiphany, but I'm not sure. Even though opening yourself up to the divine also makes you vulnerable, I have no proof or feeling of its influence. I think, I think and I think.

  I wanted to say that I feel disgusted. Disgusted, to say the least. I know it was so, and just like my belief in the gods, attaching myself to that truth is enough—regardless of how I feel about it. Of course, the feeling of pleasure in evil will always be there. It's not the one Morgana asks about. Even so-

  “Nothing. I don't feel anything. How do you feel?”

  Morgana shrugged and wandered through the forest. “Stunned, to say the least. I always thought it was possible, but you—that state—is strange. Even for me.” She says, then returns her gaze to me. “Don't worry about that now. We'll have plenty of time from now on.”

  I nod. “Right. How long have I been walking?” I change the subject awkwardly, but let it hang in the air until it disappears.

  “A week without rest. You're slow to walk like a sleepwalker, but we're already a good dozen kilometers away from Dufae.”

  “What about my arm?”

  “Aldwyn's flesh inside your body organized itself as you walked. It took the shape of an arm and replaced the old one, then swallowed it up to the base of the shoulder. So that it wouldn't hinder the flow of your power or have any unexpected effects, I sealed it. I don't recommend removing it until we know how it works.”

  “What…? An arm made of Aldwyn? Wouldn't sealing him bring him into the Unknown?”

  “It was a possibility, but I don't believe it's true. Aldwyn is dead. His consciousness was destroyed, and he hasn't appeared in the Unknown for all this time, even after I sealed his arm. Even if a fragment of him still exists… Well, we'll have to deal with that later. What do you think?”

  I swallow. The mere thought of Aldwyn being somewhere watching me and chasing me after all this frightens me. I can't feel his mana, and I doubt he'll be able to do anything if he's really alive. Still, I remember the impaled bodies, the fairy's mouth bathed in blood, the fire, and the act I committed, and I feel a shiver run down my spine.

  I nod to myself. “You're right. He is dead. That's for sure. But he's not gone. Something's left. It may be a danger, it may not. I don't know. It doesn't matter now.”

  Morgana nods. “Good.”

  “I'm sorry I made you see all that. Even the dream I had before the clearing.”

  “You underestimate my tolerance for horror. Have you forgotten who I am? When I find my sisters, I'll make Aldwyn look merciful.” She smiles as if proud of herself. “But for now, I'll settle for your apology. I'm too magnificent to see this against my will. Fortunately, you've already rewarded me by saving me from perishing with you and the rest of the village. You're a hero, kid.”

  “I couldn't have done it without you. Thank you.”

  “I know, and you're welcome.”

  I spit out a laugh. It's amazing how she can put me off even in a morbid situation like this. I have to learn how to answer her more carefully.

  “So we're friends now?”

  “I'm going to give you this privilege. Now, rest up and wake up to real life. There's someone outside who wants to talk to you. He doesn't look hostile, but I don't trust him. Be careful and…” She kisses my forehead.

  “Good luck, Sieghart.”