Seated in mismatched chairs across from each other with their crew and companions surrounding them, Rin gave Pax’s hands on hers a long look. He glimpsed the edge of a nervous smile flicker across her face, along with something else he couldn’t identify.

  Then he realized he was feeling similarly unbalanced. He couldn’t go into this without complete confidence. He glanced at the eager faces of his friends around him before giving them an apologetic shrug. “Want to give me and Rin a couple minutes of privacy to go over things?”

  Amil opened his mouth to ask something, but Bryn grabbed his shoulder as she gave Pax a quick nod. “Of course. We’ll step out for a few minutes and then just open the door when you’re done. Does that work?”

  Pax gave her a grateful nod. As they left the room, he gave Rin a sheepish look, his mind suddenly second guessing his instinct. What exactly did he need to discuss with Rin right now?

  The heavy door shut with a clang and Rin met his gaze.

  “So, what did you want to talk about?” she asked, looking more nervous than he’d seen her in a long time.

  He opened his mouth, but his brain seemed to have turned off for a moment. He couldn’t think of a single question or even a word to say.

  She waited a few long beats before one side of her mouth turned up. “Don’t tell me you’re feeling nervous about this.”

  “Of course I am.” A sudden rush of emotions too muddled to identify swelled inside him, making his words come out sharper than he meant.

  She flinched almost imperceptibly, and he winced, lowering his voice. “Sorry. It’s just this is you, Rin, not some random rebel mage I can mess up with, feel a little sad and move on.”

  He leaned forward trying to make her understand. “If I hurt you somehow, burned out your magic or, Vitur forbid, killed you, I don’t know what I would . . . if I could . . . how I—” He threw up his hands, too agitated to figure out exactly what he was trying to say.

  A complicated expression moved across Rin’s face, and she reached out to grab his hands, pulling them down to where their knees almost touched. Her grip had the strength of a warrior but was full of more comfort than control.

  Pax stilled and just stared at their hands, her warmth holding his, steadying him and there when he needed it. He let out an uneven breath as he struggled to find the words to explain what he was barely figuring out for himself.

  “You know we can do this together.” Her voice was full of utmost confidence in him. “Just like we’ve done every other impossible thing until now.”

  “And if something goes wrong?” He couldn’t seem to make her understand.

  “Then we figure it out and move on.”

  “I can’t lose you.” He shook his head. She wasn’t getting it. “I just can’t.”

  She stopped and really looked at him. She glanced away, letting out a quiet sigh before turning back to him. “I feel the same way about you.”

  Her words and what they hinted at hit him in the chest like a boulder.

  “I just figured we would postpone bringing it up or doing anything about it until, you know”—she waved a nervous hand at the world around her—“the entire world doesn’t blow up and leave us all dead.”

  “Are you saying—?” His words were still awkward and not coming out right.

  She gave him an uncertain look. “I thought you were saying—”

  They both looked at each other for a long moment. The humor of their interaction suddenly hit Pax, and he couldn’t stop a smile from forming. She noticed and a moment later, they were both laughing at themselves.

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  The laughter was a release, a breaking of the tension that had been hanging in the air. Pax leaned back in his chair, running a hand through his hair as he shook his head. “Vitur, help me, we’re a mess.”

  Rin snorted, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. “Speak for yourself. I think I’m doing just fine.”

  He gave her a pointed look. “Fine enough to avoid saying what you’re really thinking?”

  Her grin faded slightly, replaced by a softer expression. “Pax . . . I care about you. More than I’ve ever cared about anyone. And from what you were trying to say earlier, you feel the same, right?” She hesitated, waiting for a response from him.

  It took him a beat, but he nodded, acknowledging something he’d been avoiding facing for quite some time.

  She gave him a soft smile, her hands still resting lightly over his. “But this? Whatever this is, it’s big. It’s not something we can half-commit to, not with all the things happening right now.”

  He nodded, the humor giving way before the weight of everything they faced. “Yeah. You’re right. The war, the rebellion, our crew, they need us focused. Completely focused.”

  “And alive,” she added, her voice tinged with a seriousness that cut through the moment. “We’ve both seen how quickly things can go wrong. If we’re distracted, if we’re thinking more about each other than the fight in front of us—”

  Pax grimaced. She was right again, of course. But that didn’t make it easier to ignore the warmth that her presence brought or the way every day looked a little brighter when she was around. Or now, the way his chest tightened when she was in danger. He could only imagine how that would increase if they acted on what had been growing between them. “So, we wait?” he asked, his voice quieter now.

  Rin nodded, her thumb brushing over his knuckles. “We wait. But,” she added, her gaze locking onto his, “it’s not about ignoring how we feel. It’s about holding onto it. Knowing that, when this is over—when the dust settles—we’ll still be here. Together. Just like we’ll be facing every day of this war, together.”

  A warmth spread through him at her words, steady and grounding. “You’re sure about that?”

  “Absolutely.” She smiled again, smaller this time, but no less genuine. “I don’t know what the future looks like, Pax, but I know I want it to include you.”

  “Same.” He swallowed hard, her words settling deep in his heart. “You, me, the future? Everything. I want it with you, too.” He glanced at their hands, hers still holding his with her steady strength, and gave a soft chuckle. “So, we’ll do this the way we do everything else. Together. Just not as much as we might be in the future?”

  “Exactly. And when the world isn’t falling apart, we figure out what’s next.”

  “And if I mess something up with this ice magic thing?”

  “Then we’ll fix it. Together. Just like everything.” She gave him an earnest look. “But we both know nothing is guaranteed in life. We can’t be sure that we both make it through this all alive, but we can count on each of us doing the best we can for the other, right?”

  He gave her a wry smile of agreement. They sat in silence for a moment, letting the weight of their mutual understanding settle. The sound of shuffling outside the door reminded them their friends were waiting.

  Rin let out a breath and gave his hands a last squeeze before letting go and standing up. “Okay, back to work, Commander Vipersworn.”

  Pax grinned and watched her move across the training room. “You’re going to hold that over me forever, aren’t you?”

  “Oh, absolutely.” Her eyes sparkled with mischief as she reached the door. “Someone has to keep you grounded.”

  The door creaked open, and she motioned their friends back in.

  Amil aimed a curious gaze at the two of them. “Got everything figured out for Rin’s ice magic?”

  Pax couldn’t help catching Rin’s eye and giving her a grin. “Yep, that and future plans, the purpose of life, you know, everything important.”

  Amil chuckled, but then looked confused. “What?”

  Tasar, however, met Pax’s gaze and gave him a solemn nod. Pax decided the taciturn warrior was a lot more perceptive than most gave him credit for.

  Rin drew his attention back when she sat back down in the chair in front of him with a mischievous look. A sudden lightness filled Pax, knowing that she cared about him as much as he did her. He hadn’t realized how freeing it would be to acknowledge that. He knew their future was perilous, but no matter what, it would be worth it.

  “What exactly is going on—?” Pax heard Dahni whisper behind him, followed by a soft grunt as someone nudged him to be quiet.

  “Everyone ready to try for Rin’s ice?” Pax pushed all other thoughts aside and focused on the task at hand. His mind was clear and unmuddied by the confusing emotions from earlier.

  The room quieted as she straightened, her usual confidence firmly in place. “I’m ready.”

  He tipped his head, pushing aside any lingering anxiety and focusing on his excitement for the big step she was poised to take. “This is going to work. And don’t forget, once you get ice, you’ll get to choose a new spell.”

  She grinned with matching excitement. “I already have my spell picked out.”

  His eyes widened.

  “Fenix 3-one has been helping me brainstorm what would fit best with my current build.”

  “Really? What did you pick?”

  She gave him a smug grin. “Help me unlock my ice, and I’ll tell you.”

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